At 36 now, I feel very young on the one hand being very active still. And on the other hand, I look back and I see a lot of life experience. At about age 30, I started to change a lot – evolve – and I want to share why I think evolving in life is one of the best ways to attain real happiness, success, and awesome connection with others.
I think back to when I was a young man in my early 20’s. I’d just returned home from an LDS mission to Ireland and was ready to tackle the world. I thought I knew everything and that life should just work out for me because I was so awesome. After a year of being home from my mission, I was struggling in college, had little money to my name, and was very depressed. I remember switching bank accounts at that time and thinking I had $100 to my name. It actually ended up being $0 because I had charged my debit card enough to have a $100 payment needed.
It wasn’t until later on in my life that I realized I didn’t have to be broke, depressed, and out of shape. I realized I was those things because I had simply been thinking the same way I had as a child. And that process was this:
- If life gets hard, bitch about it and hope people give me attention.
- If I need money, ask someone for it.
- If I feel a connection with someone, be shy and don’t go for it.
- Don’t ruffle people’s feathers because if you do, you’ll feel some pain.
- Just go to church and pay your tithing and all will be well.
I did these things for quite a long time. And I was overweight and depressed. Thankfully, at about age 30, I believe an evolving process started happening in me. And this process caused me to ask some questions:
- What do I want my life to be like?
- What do I need to do for that to happen?
- What is holding me back?
- What is my potential?
- Is there more to life than what I’ve been taught to this point?
Simple questions like these stirred my mind and begun to open up new possibilities. Here’s some of what happened:
- Got an awesome new job as a web developer.
- Lost 50 pounds and got six pack abs.
- Started making money in investments.
- Learned how to be a real provider for my family.
- Learned how to start getting promoted at work.
- Made my own websites, mobile app, and game.
- Learned that there is so much joy and love beyond religion.
It doesn’t mean that life will always be good every day. I could get let go of the company I work for tomorrow. There are no guarantees. I’ve learned that I am most happy when I live my life with no regrets. I’m not going to be 80 years old wondering why I just coasted through life and didn’t take any chances. The tame life is not for me!
I honestly look forward to each day like it is Christmas. Each day is a new experience. When you form strong bonds and connections with people and go for what you heart feels and live with no regrets, there is a sense of purpose and meaning. And to me, this is how I’ve evolved in my life to this point. I’ve evolved from a poor and depressed person with no ambition to one who actually cares about other people and myself and wants life to be an amazing experience. And I’ve evolved to do new things to make this happen.
The question for you is, are you evolving? Are you the same person you were 5 or 10 years ago? If so, are you happy with that? Maybe you are, but chances are, you might feel the heat with your job and finances. Chances are you might feel something is missing. I encourage you to ask questions about your life and if doing something different might make a positive difference in your life. It doesn’t mean life is easy. It does mean that life can be really good even with the bad things.
Thanks for reading!
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